Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
