You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize
