never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize
