she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize