So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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