Pappa wants mamma naked
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
