Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
