I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I have aggressive nipples.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Randomize