I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Come share oat with me in your robe
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
