i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
