no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
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