So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize