I am in a vortex of obligation.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
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