he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
