Me too!
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
