Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
