Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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