Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
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