Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
whose ass print is on the piano?
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
third nipple confirmed
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
