um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Randomize
