Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
