So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Randomize
