my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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