I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
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