Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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