i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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