So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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