and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
