Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
