"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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