DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
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