I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
