He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
