is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Randomize
