Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
