Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
