o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Holy shit dude........stairs
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
