I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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