using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
