she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Randomize
