I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Randomize
