This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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