I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
