I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
tell me about the fingering
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
