I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
