im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Randomize
