I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
one two three fourrrrnication!
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
