I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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