i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
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