party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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