i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
